The Brotherhood of Fatherhood

Dads Doing Better enjoy bonding over brews

Lake Norman Currents | June 2019

By Aaron Garcia

It's unfortunate that DDB is an acronym for both Dads Doing Better and Dads Drinking Beer. It makes it seem as though it's an either-or scenario; that the meanings should be at odds. The guys wearing the initials on their shirts, however, believe they're accomplishing both at the same time.

"Sometimes, to be a good dad, you need to be around other dads," says member Jeremy Tilson.

Sometimes, that also means drinking beer.

Officially, as far as their wives are concerned, the group is called Dads Doing Better. It consists of 30-plus members, all of whom are dads, and most of whom live in the Lake Norman area. They meet semi-regularly at the area's hoppy hot spots, including breweries and bottle shops. The group even had a booth at Charlotte's Queen City Beer Festival earlier this year.

If you're thinking of this as a workshopping environment where guys spitball parenting ideas or discuss the latest expert childcare opinions, you'd be wrong. The point, says founder Eric Rowles, is to allow dads to shake off the rust and do something they used to be better at: just hanging out.

Rowles explains that modern parents often let their social lives wither while keeping up with the normal expectations of raising kids today. Men, in particular, can have a tough time resuscitating it when their schedule actually allows for them to break free for a bit.

"I found, for a lot of guys, if you're not connected in some kind of golf league or bowling league, we don't do as good of a job socializing with other guys," says Rowles.

After seeing the same dads at their kids' various practices and meetings, Rowles joined a few of them at a bar one night. That's when the idea came up.

Rowles, a motivational speaker (and a bit of a force of nature), not only set a date in July 2016 for the group's first meeting, but also had coasters made. With that, DDB went from a thought to an official club.

While the first few meetings topped out at under 10 dads, DDB's following gradually increased. Since then different contingents have spawned from bleachers and sidelines across the area, with word of mouth pulling in thirsty newcomers at each get together. Now there are soccer dads, softball dads, Girl Scout dads and more. The stipulation that each member be a father is all the commonality needed to make it work, says the group, and makes their meetings as beneficial as any in-depth conversation on parenting approaches.

"When I come home from these things, I feel refreshed," says Brian Miller. "I feel like I can devote more time to my family because I'm able to get out and experience things."

While he didn't need to, Rowles went ahead and put "Lake Norman Chapter" on DDB's official T-shirts. There are no other chapters, and no real thoughts of expansion, at least not yet. It's really a nod to the belief that his group hasn't yet tapped out its potential.

He thinks at some point they can organize events similar to the daddy bootcamps he attended when his wife was expecting their daughters, who are now 14 and 11. There's valuable knowledge and experience to be shared and stories to be told.

If, however, it doesn't balloon past being an opportunity for dads in the Lake Norman area to break free, it will have still served its purpose.

"It's about having a group of dads that can have each other's backs," Rowles explains, "and beer."